Why I believe yoga is the Answer to the Anxiety Problem
Some of you may know my story with anxiety, but I thought I would explain a bit of my journey because it is important for how I got HERE:
I had my first panic attack at 2 years old. I got the Heimlich maneuver from a security guard because I was choking on the skin of a plum. Come with me into my 2 year old brain here: I was DYING and then got beat up. So, when it was all over I cried, panicked, cried, panicked some more… hyperventilated… and passed out.
These severe episodes lasted until I was about 7 years old. It was not called an anxiety disorder yet. I was told that I suffered from panic attacks and that I was hyper. The best part was the coping mechanisms for them (I am shaking my head as I write this): My mom and my my lovely aunt (yes, the one I vacation with) were told that when I had these attacks they had to hit me hard on the leg to get my attention and get me to breathe slowly. Please don't get me wrong, I don't blame them - I can imagine it being scary that I may pass out in the mall or on the playground - they were simply afraid for me. So when I would start with the shallow, uncontrollable breathing they would yell at me, slap my leg and try to get me to calm down. This rarely worked, once my poor Aunt was almost put in jail (that's a story) and while the passing out stopped, the panic attacks took to my 30's to finally subside.
Without getting into too many details about my life, there has been some trauma, there has been some stress. From 1991 to 2006 I saw many therapists, psychologists and family doctors. All we did was talk about my past. They would sit there with their jaws dropping open as I went into detail about my life. Over and over again I felt like the sessions drained me emotionally and simply brought stuff up to the surface for me to re-live and spiral down a road of more panic attacks and even depression. All I was left feeling was that I was going to suffer for my whole life because of what had happened to me. I wished I could just cut the memories out of me.
Somewhere in the middle of it all, yoga entered my life. I cried in my first class. I went into a simple twist and sobbed. I had no idea why. I wasn't thinking about anything in particular, I wasn't reliving anything. I just felt a release and I went with it. That was somewhere around 1995/96. From that point onward I would attend the odd yoga class, or do yoga-like moves in my living room listening to a Gregorian Chants CD (thank you Columbia House). These were the only moments where I felt ease.
The reason I believe that yoga is so powerful is because the talking didn't help me, but the movement did. See, the memories are not JUST in our heads. They are in our bodies too. And not in a woo-woo kind of a way. They are in your body because, as humans when our fight or flight response (our sympathetic nervous system) is engaged, depending on what triggered the response, we have specific muscles contract to get us ready for fighting, fleeing or freezing. For example, if you see a bear we are taught NOT to run away. Why is it said to us over and over again? Well, have you ever seen a bear? I have. Many times. And I ran. I couldn't help myself. My nervous system took over and I was outta there. There was no rational thought making me slow down. Heck no. I was GONE. The nervous system went into fight or flight and I ran.
Here are some fun facts about why I believe yoga is the answer:
your muscles have cells
your cells have memory
your memories of past traumas are stored in the cells, in your muscles
… you hold the source of your anxiety in your BODY
In Peter Levine's book, Waking the Tiger, I learned that movement could be looked at as a “bottom up” approach to healing. So, when you move around - stretch, tone, dance, lift weights, run, ride a bike, etc. You have the possibility of releasing some of the tension in your body. Some of this trapped “energy” from the contraction is released - it finally has somewhere to go.
Yes, I said dance, and weights, etc. I truly believe that all forms of movement can help relieve anxiety. I chose yoga because it helped me. I chose yoga because it simultaneously asks us to look inward and breathe WHILE moving. This is just my modality. But if someone comes to my spin class and tells me they are anxious, I teach spin for anxiety, HIIT for anxiety and give Thai massages for anxiety.
Update on the Online Yoga for Anxiety Program:
I am dedicated and working hard
I still don't have my voice back yet so it's not pretty
I will have a few quizzes that will lead to some short classes for you soon
I'm toying with an app versus an online website for the program… I'm still researching as I create the content - if you have any thoughts on this, please feel free to message me with your feedback. (Ie. you would like it on an app because it would have tools, community, quizzes there, challenges, and voice memos and push notifications from me throughout the program)
